For many of us, it’s been a nail-biting and anxiety-inducing countdown to A Level results day…
…for others, it’s something we put out of our minds altogether, spending the summer in the sun forgetting that exams ever even happened!
But whatever your journey, and however you thought your A Level exams went, there’s one thing we know for certain: that every year, there are these 5 types of students on A Level results day!
So, which one are you?
1. The nervous wreck :S
This one will be pacing up and down the school hall, muttering incomprehensible words to themselves and gripping onto their closed envelope as if opening it will start a nuclear war!
If you ask them how they’re feeling, they’ll snap “I’M FINE” with a smile that tells you a breakdown is imminent.
The nervous wreck will avoid eye contact at all costs. They don’t want to be spoken to, fearful that a single word could make them shatter into a million pieces.
But despite their external fragility, underneath it all they’ll be building themselves up, with a calming and reassuring inner voice,
“You can do it, everything will be fine.
It’s just a piece of paper.
Give it another minute and then slowly open the envelope.
Take it one step at a time.”
10 minutes of building themselves up, in an instant, the envelope will be ripped apart as if it’s done something horribly evil and deserves it. And once they’ve had time to scan the A Level results, with the small remnants of the envelope blindingly scattered across the school floor, all of their pent up emotions will come out in a deafeningly loud outburst.
It’ll sound like a bunch of raving baboons just entered the building.
Who knows if they’ll still be standing or rolling around on the floor from relief. Whatever happens, it’ll be loud, there will be tears, and it’ll be a mess.
But don’t worry.
If you’re the nervous wreck type, just know that everything will be ok.
And if you’re not the nervous wreck type, just remember to stay well clear (at least 10 metres) from those who are, to avoid unintentional, albeit potentially long-lasting physical damage.
Also, bring earplugs!
2. The quietly confident one 😉
This type of student will stroll into the school hall in the same way you might walk into your local Sainsbury’s to do your weekly grocery shop. It’s merely a practicality.
If you ask them how they’re feeling, they’ll just respond with a few polite words like “I’m okay, I don’t think I’ve done too well in maths but let’s see.” When what they’re really thinking is “I know I’m going to get 10 A*s, but I don’t want to make you feel bad about it.” In reality, they’ll be glad you’ve asked, and definitely hoping you’ll ask them again once they’ve got their A Level results.
The quietly confident one will have a disconcertingly calm yet reassuring demeanour, and every movement will be seamless and intentional: walk in, pick up the envelope, open the envelope, nod, wry smile, walk out.
You probably won’t even notice them come in and out of the room.
3. The selfless supporter <3
This is the caring one, the one who knows that results day is a stressful time for all of their friends. Sure, they’ve come to pick up their own results, but really they’re there to make sure everyone leaves the school hall alive and happy.
You’ll find the selfless supporter giving hugs all round, never once mentioning their own A Level results – in fact, they’ll probably open their results when they get back home, out of everybody else’s way.
Whether your results are better than you expected or worse, you know the selfless supporter will be there for you, imparting words of wisdom and making sure you feel comforted or celebrated, whatever the outcome.
Not all heroes wear capes.
4. The loud and proud one!!
This one will blitz into the school hall like it’s Vodka Revs on a Friday night.
After scouting the room to see “what the sitch is” and cracking jokes with all of the parents, they’ll swagger over to the results table and open their envelope like it’s a bottle of WKD.
A little insensitively, you can be sure to know exactly how the loud and proud one did – subject by subject and grade by grade (whether you like it or not). Not that it matters to them, they’ve already got an unconditional offer from Bath, which they’ve told you about 15 times already.
Before they leave the room, the loud and proud one will make sure they’ve added you on Facebook so that they can invite you to their Freshers’ week (which is going to be sick, btw).
5. The one who doesn’t even show up :O
For this one, A Level results day is just all too much.
Watching Netflix under the duvet covers just seemed like a much better option…
…indeed, their results may never get opened. Ignorance is bliss.
Whichever type of student you are, all jokes aside, we wish you the very best on A Level results day. And if your A Level results aren’t as you expected, you can reach out to our team on email@example.com at any time for advice.